Customer: Hi my Norton expired.

Me: Okay so you would like to purchase a new one 

Customer: Well no. Luckily another program popped up called Security Shield so I’ll just keep that. I was just wondering if it’s as good as Norton before I give it my credit card to buy the full version.

Me: Did you install Security Shield?

Customer: No it just showed up after Norton expired.

some days are harder than others to keep a straight face-_-

Little piece of advice to anyone who needs to buy a cable. Know the name! If you come in and ask for the “fat phone cord” you look like an idiot. That’s like taking a diesel pickup to the gas station and telling the guy to put “the smelly gas” in.

So a quick tidbit about me. I fix computers, sometimes ATMS or Lottery Equipment (though to be honest the other tech gets most of those), and do some networking and work on point of sales devices in stores. Things like that! Anyway, where I work also has a retail side. Now anybody who has ever worked in retail can vouch for me that it skews your views on humanity to a point where even you seem surprised at the words coming out of your mouth in those sweet moments after you see a customer come in but before they can hear you. So yesterday this greasy guy with broad shoulders, long hair hair sticking out of a plain gray toque, and a few tattoos that scream wannabe bad as came in the store. Totally unbidden the first words out of my mouth were “Aw man this guy looks like he wants to be a sailor but instead just rapes them”. I’d like to say I talked to him and he was a nice guy and I felt abashed, but he was a douche bag.